Archive | January, 2011

On Kindness

23 Jan

Usually, an act of kindness can reduce me to tears easier than an act of unkindness. I think it’s because I expect people to be cruel, disrespectful, unkind, selfish, greedy and arrogant; unkindness is like a common cold, it spreads from person to person like it’s contagious, and everyone falls victim to it once in a while. Soon, one comes to expect indifference or unkindness to be everyone’s default state.

Sometimes I think my acts of kindness are somewhat selfish – it’s not that I do them expecting something in return – I do them just because I can, however, they make me feel good. Is that so bad to feel happy because you think that you might have made someone else happier? I don’t think so. It is so easy to be unkind, and it is also completely painless to be kind to someone.

Oh, apparently kindness is the direct opposite to envy. Mayhap, my random acts of kindness will help to balance things out! Also, in a study of 37 cultures around the world, sixteen thousand subjects were asked about their most desired traits in a mate. For both sexes, the first preference was kindness. I suppose that being kind can only help my chances of getting someone to fall in love with me =]

“Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle”. I believe in this.

So when was your most recent random act of kindness?

Goodnight, dear void.

This Song is Dedicated To Her..I Mean You

21 Jan

Fathead went for the Junkyard Groove concert last night, which apparently was an AMAZING show. She was all excited because we have been fans for years and this was her first time seeing them live in concert as her texts show:

8:22 – we entered wit the band…basically

9:48 – its SO aweesome dude!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


..and so on in this vein.

Oh I should mention that the lead singer of Junkyard Groove knows both my sister and me,  though he knows me better than her. So anyhoo, Fathead asked him to dedicate ‘Folk You’, her favorite Junkyard Groove song to her and she was all mega-excited because of the anticipated  special mention.

So in the middle of the concert, the band gears up to play ‘Folk You’ and Ameeth goes… “and this song is dedicated to a girl called…(insert my name here)”.



So she calls me up and tells me what happened while the song is playing and I’m laughing SO hard and for SO long that my lungs  literally feel fucked. Then she cut my call because I couldn’t hear a thing she was saying after that.So I texted her for confirmation and  she replies:

10:45 – he dedicated folk yu to me but he calls me by your name so that sucks

Awww.But still fucking hilarious.

lust objects: marchesa gowns

18 Jan

im listening to..

16 Jan

Wiping the green away from my eyes

15 Jan

I don’t think I have a lot of vices beyond envy but that’s a big one. I’m not a virtuous woman despite what my name suggests, but it’s not like I commit 6.45 sins on a daily basis either. Like most people I indulge in various vices: I’m a compulsive liar, covet various things/people that belong to other people, though I haven’t killed anyone in quite a while. Envy is different though, notoriously one of the seven deadly sins, it’s an ugly ugly feeling especially when concerning a friend.

Being envious of others is an easy way to make yourself very unhappy. I always hurt the ones whom I love the most, and this is usually because I’m jealous of some accomplishment of theirs. I don’t know why. I should be proud of them, I should be happy for their success, instead of which I feel resentment.  It’s my hugest failing and the one thing I am truly ashamed of.

I don’t even know how to deal with it. I think I cope better when things are going alright in my life – when my self-esteem isn’t at a low point. Somehow someone else’s success to me, highlights my own failings (yes I know this isn’t rational). And then I feel bitter at myself for acting like such a child. Like I said, being envious is a very easy way to be unhappy.

God saw the danger in feeling thousands of years ago and banned it in his Tenth Commandment. So not only do I have to fret about envy’s effect in my daily life but it’s another thing to worry about when thinking about the state of my soul. Sigh.

Anyhow, I found this advice on dealing with envy on a website “Instead of viewing success as a limited resource being doled out capriciously or carried away by more successful predators, view it as an ever-expanding pie.” . I don’t know how well it works, but whatever helps right?

I can only hope to be as great as the people around me someday.

Goodnight, dear void.

Things I Will Do In 2011 List

9 Jan

I love writing lists. There is this sense of accomplishment that comes with writing down a list of things to do and then checking them off as each item is completed. Umberto Eco agrees with me. Eco says that “the list has an irresistible magic”. For instance, “ There is an allure to enumerating how many women Don Giovanni slept with: It was 2,063, at least according to Mozart’s librettist, Lorenzo da Ponte. We also have completely practical lists — the shopping list, the will, the menu — that are also cultural achievements in their own right.

So this year I want to:

1)      Have sex in the ocean (I already foresee that ending badly)

2)      Buy myself 50 of those red heart balloons at a go

3)      Fall in love for the first time  (hopefully)

4)      Get something published online/sell a print on Deviantart

5)      Make a trip to Bombay

6)     Do acid

7)      Learn to cook SOMETHING (even maggi would do)

8)      Be a social work volunteer – it has been way too long

9)      Learn how to tango

10)   Watch porn with a guy and critique it along the way

11)   Compose a song with Resham

12)   Sing in a choir/acapella group

13)   Start playing a competitive physically exhausting sport again – chee, I meant like basketball, get your mind out of the gutter

14)   Road/bike trip

15)    Go for a concert by an international artist – it has been way waay too long  (sends silent prayer up to God *please PLEASE let  Muse decide to make an India trip*)

16)   Have someone to kiss on New Year’s Eve 2011 12:00 A.M

No. 16 sounds totally random and greedy. Another 355 days to prepare for it. No. 3 sounds like the most formidable. But the rest sounds achievable. Good.

Goodnight, dear void.

You Know You’re PMSing when…

6 Jan

you’re watching Blue Crush (for lack of a better idea) and you’re at the part where the heroine finally overcomes her personal obstacles to surf through that huge-ass killer wave, and realizing that you are fighting back tears